Reset

I am thinking of reset. A reset of me.

I’ve been functioning like this for far too long. Almost 41 years.

I want to make a change.

Big time!

Overwhelming!

Earth-shattering!

Sometime ago I started to wonder if the therapy is working. This week I finally gathered my courage and talked with my therapist about my concerns. She listened, she defended herself and her method and I am willing to continue. After all I had the guts to tell her what I though, what bothered me and what I wanted from her.

So, here I go: I will appreciate myself more, I will celebrate my victories, I will figure out a way to accept my flows and my mistakes, like anyone else. I will be good enough for myself and others that are willing to accept and respect me for who I am and how I am. I will not tolerate emotional abuse. I will be self-sufficient as much as possible but I will learn to ask for help. And I will learn to ask for what I need. I will learn to accept rejection as an option and as an opportunity to test other options. I will learn to say no if it is warranted. I can not be everything for everyone and do everything. I am smart enough to figure what is warranted and what is not, what really matters and is important and what is doable and what is useful and what is really needed.